kindness Helping a stranger in distress

[Sally]

Something happened a couple of days ago which on reflection feels like it might have been a test from the universe.  I went for a walk with my neighbour in a relatively quiet place in the grounds of an old manor house.  We walked to the end of a long driveway with fields either side and when we got to the end of the main driveway a young girl about 21 years old appeared put of the woods asking for a light.  She seemed a bit all over the place and asked where she was and she said she had been running away from a horrible man.  This made me feel a bit scared because the girl kept looking behind her and said she was being chased but I was very concerned for the girl as she appeared to be in distress and I felt very strongly that we should help her to safety.   I thought maybe she was having a breakdown or something.  She was in a vulnerable state.  I explained where we were and where we were headed but she said she didn't know where she was.  We started walking with her back up the path.  She kept saying "thank you, thank you God bless you"  She said she had been running more than she had ever run in her life.  She said she was under the mental health team for drugs and alcohol.  I noticed she was in her pyjamas with a jumper on top.  I offered her my drink of water which she took.  She said she had just had a seizure from epilepsy.  I felt responsible for her safety and felt that we should stick waking with her even though I didn't really know what to do.  I was considering calling the police when we got to the entrance to the manor.  

Then a male friend of hers rang her and the girl handed me her phone and asked me to speak to him which I did.  I explained to him where we were located and he said he was about 5 minutes drive away and he agreed to meet us outside the church.  The girl wanted me to put his number in my phone as she had no battery.  So I did and rang him to tell him to walk down the driveway when he arrived to meet us.  Eventually we got to the end of the drive and saw a man walking towards us.  Her friend was dressed in work clothes and looked like a painter and decorator.  We spoke briefly and I saw that he seemed OK and she seemed Ok with him so we just let them drive off together.  They were both grateful for what we had done and were full of thanks.  And then it hit me what had just happened.  Had we done the right thing?  Had I passed the test (if it was a test) - I hope so!

My friend and I drove back home and she said I had seemed really stressed during the incident and couldn’t understand why I was so stressed but I felt as responsible for this girl as if it had been my own daughter in distress and I knew I had to help her.  It also reminded me of when I was that same young age and was in the middle of a nervous breakdown and was wondering the streets of London at night lost not knowing where I was and a man started talking to me and held my hand and helped me walk to Euston station where I would be safer.  I then got the tube close to home and rang my parents asking them to pick me up.  I remember feeling like this man that was walking through the streets with me was in fact an angel as he was really kind. Without his help I could easily have gone missing or goodness knows what may have happened.  I am very grateful for his assistance and really believed his was an angel sent to help me.  

I just hope and pray that this girl is OK now and in a safe place.  I hope we did the right thing.  I just feel like it was a bit of a test for me but I did my best to help her. 

  

[James]

Hi @Sally,

It's really interesting to read your experience, and it definitely sounds like a situation that would leave you reflecting. From my perspective, what you and your neighbour did was absolutely the right thing.

You encountered a young woman who was clearly vulnerable and in distress. Regardless of the specifics of her situation – whether it was a mental health crisis, a genuine threat, or a combination – your instincts to ensure her safety were spot on. You offered her water, stayed with her, and facilitated a connection with someone she knew. These are all compassionate and helpful actions.

I can completely understand why you felt so responsible. Seeing someone in that state, especially with her mentioning being chased and her vulnerability, would trigger a strong empathetic response in most people. The fact that it resonated with your own past experience in London only amplifies that feeling of needing to help. That memory of the "angel" who assisted you clearly shaped how you approached this situation, and that's a beautiful thing.

And yes, I also believe that the Universe often presents us with these kinds of moments, these potential tests. Whether this specific incident was one or not is hard to say definitively, but I agree with your feeling that it certainly felt like one. Regardless of the label, you acted with kindness and courage in a situation where someone needed help. That's what truly matters.

Your friend's comment about you seeming stressed is understandable too. When you feel that level of responsibility for a stranger's well-being, especially in a potentially uncertain situation, it's natural for your stress levels to rise. It shows how much you cared.

Ultimately, you connected this young woman with someone she knew and who was coming to help her. You ensured she wasn't alone and potentially in danger. You acted with good intentions and did what you could in the moment with the information you had.

I sincerely hope the young woman is now safe and getting the support she needs. And I think you should feel good about how you handled a difficult and potentially worrying situation. You showed compassion and acted in a way that clearly came from a place of genuine care. That's a "pass" in my book, test or no test.